Imposter Syndrome Meets Mentorship

Finding passion again through someone else’s fire.

Whenever the conversation turns to mentorship, it usually revolves around how the mentor taught the mentee so much and became such an inspiration. And that’s a beautiful perspective. It really is.

But it’s one I’ve heard and never fully related to.

Because I deal with imposter syndrome — damn you, self-esteem — I didn’t always see myself as inspirational or someone to look up to. Having the confidence to say, “I know what to do and say to someone younger than me,” scared me. If I’m honest, it still does.

AIGA Shine final presentation June 2024

But I want to talk about the time I was a mentor—and how my mentee helped me through a darker season of my life. Because sometimes the light at the end of the tunnel isn’t ahead of you.

Sometimes it’s sitting across from you on a Zoom call.

The Start of Something Scary (I Think)

I’ll be honest: I’m not the most confident person. I’d even go so far as to say… insecure. Yikes. Trigger, trigger.

Being the teacher. The mentor. The “adult.” The person someone looks up to. That’s terrifying.

I’m basically Courage the Cowardly Dog. Loud. Dramatic. Screaming internally while trying to function.

So when my good friend Natalia — one of the most incredible, creative, and talented people I know — was running an AIGA event called Shine (a four-month, project-based mentorship program where the mentee leads a project and the mentor serves as a guide), and she asked if I’d be open to mentoring…

Natalia and I before the final presentation for Shine

My brain immediately time-traveled. Because seven years earlier — around 2019 — I was a mentee in that same program. And I was even more insecure back then.

The process was cool, but I knew I wasn’t ready. I was overwhelmed. (I mean… I still am sometimes, but now I know how to manage it — kinda.) My mentor was cool, calm, and collected. Her name was Ashley, and I learned so much in the short amount of time we met. She had just moved to the area and started a new job. I didn’t want to be a bother. I felt behind in my own work. Add indecision about what my project should be, and well…

I never finished it.

My unfinished project from 2019

So when Natalia asked me to mentor, all of that came rushing back. And what do you think I said? Well. Obviously, I said yes — or I wouldn’t be writing about being a mentor. Duh. Keep up.

Who Let Me Be in Charge?

After I said yes, the doubt kicked in. What could I possibly offer a young designer? Who was I to teach anyone? Cue Courage again.

I heard something interesting here at the AIGA Shine presentation

No matter what that little pink mutt goes through, no matter what scares him, he still finds the courage to do what needs to be done. So with Courage in my head (for whatever reason), I filled out the survey.

I was later matched with a gifted designer named Logan.

They had a background in digital design and wanted to shift into print. Lucky for them — and, honestly, for me — I have a strong background in print production. It’s almost like the survey worked. Who knew.

On our first call, I could tell Logan meant business. We chit-chatted, then got straight into building a full project concept and schedule. Already doing more in one meeting than I did years earlier.

Logan’s idea? Designing a tarot deck — half illustrated by a community of artists, the other half by them. Ambitious. Conceptual. Collaborative. Bold.

Immediately, I felt like I couldn’t match that energy. But I tried. From February to June of 2024, we met every other week — sometimes in person — from Baltimore to DC. We made it work.

Logan and I presenting the final project

And somewhere in the background of my fear, something shifted. Admiration. Inspiration.

Watching someone so passionate and driven stirred something in me that I felt I had lost along the way. Every conversation felt like I was learning more than I was teaching. But if you asked Logan, they’d say I taught them so much about print production and design systems.

And that’s when I had to remind myself:

I have lived a life.

I have experience.

I have wisdom.

Even if I don’t always see it.

But it’s worth it… right?

So What Did I Actually Learn?

Looking back, I can admit I didn’t feel ready for that responsibility.

Especially if I had been paired with a mentee like the version of myself from years ago. I think part of me wanted to be the mentor I wish I had — not because my mentor wasn’t wonderful, but because we didn’t stay in touch. It felt transactional. Event-based.

As a mentee, I didn’t want to bother her. As a mentor, I realized I could choose differently.

Logan and I at the AIGA Shine event

I could reach out.

I could stay connected.

I could be present in a way my younger self needed.

And if I hadn’t said yes? I wouldn’t have met someone who unknowingly helped me pivot my goals from just design… to teaching.

What I gained wasn’t just a mentee or even a friend. It was the understanding that just as I shape someone, they can shape me — if I let them. That’s why I’m so excited about stepping into teaching this year.

Logan and I were at a bar before the final AIGA presentation

Not because I’ll magically know everything. But because I won’t. Because learning doesn’t stop when you become “the adult.” Because fear doesn’t disqualify you. Because sometimes passion is contagious.

And sometimes someone else’s fire can relight your own.

See you in the next one.